"Conservatorship" and Paulson’s Bazooka

No, this is not an article about an upcoming book by Alan Greenspan titled “Beam Me Up Scotty.”

The two companies that are allegedly having a negative impact on the housing market, Fannie Mae (FNM) and Freddy Mac (FRE), (aka the Clampetts) are going to be placed under house arrest and controlled by the Government.

What, all of a sudden the government has a project team of efficiency experts ready to hit the ground running?

This is really an experiment in positive thinking and a new project management initiative by Henry Paulson called “Conservatorship.” I think it should be put on the ballot in November.

Which one of the Presidential candidates will be able to pull off a Franklin Roosevelt and drastically improve the economy so that everybody’s pot can be in a Beverly Hills mansion? By the time they get done screwing up “Conservatorship,” nobody’s fannie will be in Beverly Hills, and Freddie will be Kruegered on NASDAQ (FKED).

I point out a statement Paulson gave Congress in July, at a Senate Banking Committee hearing, "If you have a bazooka in your pocket and people know it, you probably won't have to use it."

So, I guess either McCain or Obama will have to wave some magic wand to deflect the consequences of Paulson’s bazooka, because Congress has been acting like a bunch of slugs in a salt ring.

No comment from Federal Reserve incumbent, Ben Shalom Bernanke. You can be sure, however, that the government will be the 800 lb. gorilla in the room at the title insurance company office the next time you buy or sell a house.

I'm no accounting expert, but I never thought conservator and bazooka were synonymous, and is it really Fannie and Freddy driving the housing market into the pits, or Banking Industry and government mismanagement? Do they fully understand the concept of diverse portfolios?

They lie to us, just like the oil industry.

Every time I turn on the news I hear things like, the price of oil is up “on news of [you can fill in the blank with the excuse of the day, bon appetit!].” On what? I figure it’s the fact that they can raise the price of oil like a dog scratches his balls – because he can.