Saturday, July 24, 2010

E. B. Heron in Boston

E.B. wearing his Mystery Monkey of Tampa Bay T-shirt on I-90, Boston

Rose A. Valenta, E.B. Heron, Mary DiZazzo Trumbull, Eileen and Jimmy Keck - Robert Benchley Society gathering,
July 17, 2010, Boston.

Last weekend was amazing. I took E. B. Heron, the official mascot of the Erma Bombeck Writers’ Workshop to Boston. There, he met up the folks at the Robert Benchley Society. As you know, E.B. was actually named after E. B. White, who wrote for The New Yorker Magazine and occasionally hung out with Robert Benchley and Dorothy Parker at the Algonquin Hotel in New York.

E. B. Heron thoroughly enjoyed himself; first, donning his Mystery Monkey of Tampa Bay T-shirt enroute to Boston, and then wearing a nice tux for a black tie dinner aboard the yacht, “Secret Love” (I will post more about dinner with photos later).

E.B. now has his own fan club on Facebook called The Letters and Travels of E. B. Heron. You can look him up and follow him as he travels around the country. You might also want to send a friend request to Elwyn B. Heron to delve deeper into his private life and photo albums.

He doesn’t drive, so he relies on trusted Erma Bombeck Writers’ Workshop members , a.k.a. “Ermies,” to take him on special road trips and visits.

He is a bit if a pain in the car, yelling things like “Are we there yet? Are we there yet?” or “Open a window, I gotta go!” So, not all of the Ermies volunteer to take him on interesting excursions. Plus, you must never call him names like "Flat Stanley" or he will not get into the car.

So far, he has traveled with humorist, Wanda Argersinger, author of Life in the Land of Confusion -; Jody Worsham, author of The Medicare Mom; and me.

I can usually pacify him with goldfish crackers, but he is one tough cookie.

This year, I called Enterprise Rent-a-Car and leased a Chevrolet HHR to drive from Philadelphia to Boston. The car was roomy enough to give E.B. his own suite by the back hatch. The Goldfish crackers kept him quiet until we reached a rest stop on I-90, then he beat my ear all the way to Beacon St. I made a wrong turn and had to backtrack out on the expressway. I was ready to toss him out of the car, but he was reprieved by a sign on the highway that read “U-Turn to Boston.” Apparently, a lot of other people transport herons to Boston too.

On Friday, I took him to David and Mary Trumbull’s cabana at the Clubs on Charles St. where he behaved himself near the shrimp. Then, we went to dinner at Scollay’s Square, where he met Ed Tasca, winner of the 2010 Robert Benchley Award for Humor and author of the new humor novel, Lub Dub.

E.B. Heron and Ed Tasca at Scollay’s Square, Boston

I had to sneak him past the registration desk at the Omni Parker House Hotel, but managed to get him into the elevator before anyone noticed that he was inebriated.

Saturday night was the main event, the humor awards dinner. E. B. wore a hand-made designer tuxedo from the House of Argersinger in Pensacola, aboard the private yacht Secret Love.

I will post more fiascos later in the week.


Marti said...

Sounds like quite a trip!

Dawn said...

Oh, E.B., you are such a traveling stud. Come back to me. I have plenty of Goldfish crackers!!

Anonymous said...

E.B.: Can't wait to see your tux photos! Joanie-