A Chilton, Wisconsin, man is being detained in connection with an alleged arson. The suspect, Senior Gondolas Sin Pelo, claims that he was cleaning up his apartment with gasoline, got exhausted, lit up a cigar and all hell broke loose.
Why the gasoline?
Apparently, he was siphoning gas and went indoors to wash his hands. He turned a door knob that hadn’t been cleaned in 15 years with his gas soaked hand and all the old dried up Chicza Mayan rainforest chewing gum slid off. He got so excited, that he filled up an empty bottle of spray cleaner with gasoline, put on some Salsa music, and cleaned up the whole place. Oh la chispa! It was beautiful!
However, when he finally relaxed, took his clothes off, and lit up a nice cigar, the apartment exploded.
By the time Menasha police got to the scene, Senior Sin Pelo, was screaming and singing a Jerry Lee Lewis hit tune “Great Balls of Fire.”
The other 11 smoked-out tenants in the apartment complex were angry and refused to pour flour or corn starch on him. As a result, his face looked like a chili rellenos special without the egg white coating.
I think he might be eligible for the 2009 Darwin Award.